Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

american picky body swappers

Danielle keeps bugging me about going on a pick. What she doesn't understand is that I need her at the office, making contacts, calling clients, sending us jobs. We can't spare her.

Mike has been promising me for 10 years now that he would take me along on one of his trips, and it still hasn't happened yet. This is bullshit!

Ooh! I just got an idea. One of the antiques Mike found has magical powers, I believe it will actually swap bodies.

Let's see how he likes being the girl in the office while I go on the pick in HIS body!

Alright Mike.. I mean Danielle, email me a map of the next job on my blackberry
*pout* Yea whatever, I can't believe you stole my body!

So Danielle, you ready to go picking?
Frank.. I've never been more ready in my life!

Look Mike, I know it's been weeks now, but Danielle doesn't want to come back home, she's having too much fun

FRANK! You tell her to come home with my body, I've had just about enough of this!

HA HA! he's had enough of this? He hasn't hardly had a taste of what I've had to deal with the last 10 years!

Do you realize what it's like to be a man all your life and then suddenly have to be a girl? I mean just dealing with this long hair alone is enough to drive me crazy!

Ford sync version 2.0

See the latest version of ford sync. Just press the Sync button, and speak what you want, including wishes. Need to blend in with the other soccer moms? No problem, presto change-o and you look like any other MILF.

Getting pulled over? Quick! Change into a hot blonde, your chances of getting out of that speeding ticket just increased big time!

Having engine problems? Turn yourself into a hottie and you'll have a line of guys pulling over to help you out.


"Hey! give me my body back you pervert!"
"Sorry, but I'm keeping this young hot body, enjoy my old dude body"

"Crap! I must have screwed up the spell, it's been 2 hours and these still haven't stopped growing"

"Dude, when I asked you to turn me into a girl so I could sneak into the girl's locker room, I said give me some decent boobies, not mountains! I'm going to stick out like a sore thumb with this huge rack. I'm trying to blend in dumbass!"

He awoke the next morning to find this view. Something definitely wasn't right. Oh crap, did she use that medallion on ME?? What was she doing?"

Monday, December 27, 2010

the vandals - My First Xmas, As A Woman

first time I heard this song.. Interesting song

life of a crossdresser

So today I have the day off, wife is at a long day of work. I have stuff I could do, but now that christmas is over there's nothing pressing that NEEDS to get done cept maybe a little laundry. I had a feeling crossdress overtones would take over my day. I haven't dressed in a while, much less have I dressed up to the nines. Rather than kill my day dressed up all day, I thought I would do it in steps. First do a little body maintenance. Just a little trimming down there, shower, wash/condition my hair. A little trimming turned into trimming everywhere, which led to bringing my razor in with me into the shower. Now it seems like everytime I try shaving, I almost always end up cutting myself (a couple times REALLY badly, usually on the back of my legs where it's hard to reach). I always use the vibrating shaver on my face, but not sure about my body, so I decided to try it.

Started out just shaving my chest, after all what dress looks good with chest hairs sticking out? Oh look at that, my nipples finally look good.. feminine. Why stop here I ask myself? Because my wife doesn't like when I shave my body, that's why. But I haven't shaved in SUCH a long time, how mad can she be? Ok fine, just shave my stomach. Oh but why stop there? Keep going baby, shave your thighs. Shave shave shave.. Well I certainly can't stop there, I might as well shave both my legs.

But of course what does every woman and crossdresser (particularly the latter) face? That's right, that imaginary stopwatch. How quickly can I get this done and not cut myself and not run out of hot water? Oh you 40 gallon hot water tank, why can't you be bigger or quicker to heat water?

By the time I got about 80% done, I could feel the water start to cool off.
"Crap! I'm not done shaving, nor have I rinsed my hair or conditioned it yet!"

Needless to say, I managed to finish shaving myself in cold water, and not a SINGLE nick on any body part, and I think the cold water helped my hair snap a bit.


"Oh my gosh!! what did you do to me? I haf a va-geena!"
"I turned you into a spanish woman"
"Spaneesh? But whyyy.. spaneesh?"
"Because you'll be easier to negotiate if your spanish. Think about it, you have no identification, no green card, as far as the law is concerned your an illegal immigrant"
"Wha? I don't understand what you are saying"
"Well it's simple really. You do what I want, and I change you back. If you don't play along, I call immigration, and they deport you to Mexico. Think about it, all alone in that sexy body, with no money, nowhere to live, no job. You'll end up a prostitute in days just to get by"
"So then what do you want from me?"
"You know what I want, what every guy wants"
"You don't mean..."
"You know it, now start sucking!"

"Mmmph, you are one seeck bastage"
"Be nice... I might be enjoying this, but how pretend like your enjoying this. In fact get on your back, I'm pretty hard now, I wanna fuck you"

"Oh yea baby, your pussy is so tight!"
(I hope he really changes me back after this!)

being a girl not so bad?

"why did you turn me into a girl? this sucks! I'm blonde, I'm wearing pink, I feel so frilly!"
"No you don't dude, you look hot!"

"Really? well if you like this, check out my rack!"
"Yea, that's what I'm talking about"

(Hmm.. now I get it, women have this power over men. I show my body, and he turns into a pile of goo staring at my body)

"Check out my ass, giggle"
"Yea, keep going baby"

"You want some of this hot pussy?"
"Oh you know I do"

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

kelly osbourne

I sorta admire her. I mean for the longest time, I thought both kids were trolls. The son seemed like he had no interest in anything, and the daughter was just getting fat and turning goth (not that there's anything wrong with either of those things).

Then she turned her life around, lost 50 pounds and got a makeover. Now she actually looks hot. Not that you have to be skinny and be blonde to be attractive, but she doesn't look depressed anymore either. You look at people like lindsey lohan and britney spears who have been gifted with looks and a body, and they've lived such a hard life that they look rough now.

But look how good kelly looks (and her parents aren't the most attractive people in the world):

Virtual reality making a comeback, thanks to microsoft

So I don't know how many of you have been following the Kinnect device, or more imporantly the hacks that have enabled it to be an open source device on the PC. This video shows many of these hacks in one video:

Then I came across this article:

This guy has taken the kinect, paired it with some japanese anime characters, a head mounted display, and has essentially created his own virtual reality where he's inside this female character:

Granted these aren't the greatest graphics, but imagine pairing this interaction with the graphics of an xbox:

showering in my new body

Oh god, I've wanted to shower as a woman for as long as I can remember, feeling the water hit my curvy body.

Always loved watching women soaping up their breasts too, now I have my own to play with.. I spose I should have taken off my earrings first before I got in the shower huh?

borrowed mommy's medallion

"Dude, I totally borrowed my mom's medallion and one of her dresses.. Look, I have a vagina! Wanna see her boobies?"

my hair is so long!

OMG! how did you turn me into a babe? and... why did you turn me into a babe?

Monday, December 20, 2010

medallion, new rule

I thought it would be interesting if there was a new rule to the magical medallion. If you make a guy cum while your a female, you have to wait twice as long to change back. that's right, instead of 12 hours, your stuck in that hot female body for a full 24 hours.

"Mmmm, your cock feels so good in my pussy. Just don't climax ok baby?"

"Son of a bitch! Why did you cum? Now I'm stuck in this blonde bimbo body for even longer!"

"Hey! why'd you sneak that medallion on me? and why are you naked?"

"Fine, I'll lick your cock a little bit, but don't get too excited, and above all don't cum!"

"SON OF A BITCH!! I asked you to not cum! Now I gotta be a woman for 24 hours dude!"

have you been a good little boy?

"Oh santa, you finally gave me what I REALLY wanted for christmas. How can I ever thank you?", said micheal
"Oh I have an idea how you can thank me, it's quite oral"

magic is simple

"Holy crap, are you kidding me? it's that easy?"
"It's that easy, just a quick spell and we're both chicks. Now what do you say we make out?"

sex change checkup

"Ever since I went on those hormones you gave me, I seem to have a pain down here, right between my legs"
"Oh that's normal, that called wet pussy syndrome, I can help ease that pain"

Don't press that button!

"What button did you press on this mysterious machine DAVE?!!"
..."Ahhh!!! I don't even make a good looking woman!"
....."You?? Look how hideous I am!"
......"I look kinda cute.. wait, what am I saying?"

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

coworker jealousy

So I haven't crossdressed in a long time, could be months (been so busy in life, busy at work). There's a co-worker that is very petite, and always dresses so well (blonde hair, which changes frequently too). The other day I had to ask her some questions about a project I was working on, and the first thing I notice is her hair and business outfit, then she walks over to a bookshelf to grab a giant binder, and I couldn't help but notice her shoes.. Fucking animal print 5" heels!

Most guys immediate thought would be "Oh I would love to get in bed with you". Mine of course was "Oh if only I could borrow your cute little body for a day and just try on outfits".

Been losing weight lately (on a new sorta diet), and have lost another 8 pounds, so I finally found some time today to crossdress (weight loss is finally really starting to show in my gut), and I must say I feel pretty good.