“Oh god, seriously?” he thought to himself as he farted and smelled flowers. He couldn’t even be disgusting if he tried. Women really were made of sugar and spice and everything nice

Bob went into the local hardware store to get some nails for building his deck. He asked one of the clerks where he could find nails, and the employee asked what kind of nails. He responded angrily “NAILS! YOU KNOW, NAILS! THE THINGS YOU POUND WITH A HAMMER!” The employee was tired of the abuse from customers, so he mumbled a chant, and suddenly bob had nails.. Of course they weren’t exactly the kind he was looking for.

How different corporal punishment was in the future inside prisons. No longer were there electric chairs, they had all been converted into gender changing chairs. This was a much more fitting punishment, and was great for rehibilitation. Worst part? They were put into general population of the gender they started with, it seemed to make all the men happy.

He was always swiping his roomates bath soap. This one seemed like a new formula, and for some reason it made the water glow pink. Hmm, no matter. As he passed out in the warm water, his body began to change. Won't he be surprised when he wakes up.

Why just take a vacation as yourself? Take a vacation AWAY from yourself. At total recall, we'll send you on a 2 week vacation without even packing a bag, worrying about air travel.

He went into his wife's purse to find some aspirin. He probably should have asked her instead of just taking the first pill he found. Now he REALLY had a headache to deal with.

Poindexter loved world of warcraft, he always played as a female character. Little did he know there were real wizards playing the game. One night, someone casted a spell over the internet, and suddenly he found his chest expanding until his shirt popped open.